Chapter 5 - Back to Square One

So, I've been out there. Been dating. And back to square one. I met a couple guys who found me on myspace and dated briefly. Let's see, we'll start with a guy who looked really good in his pictures. We instant messaged quite a bit and then decided to meet. I invited him over to my house and grilled out and had a movie that we were going to watch together, one that he really wanted to see. Everything seemed great with this guy except that he had 4 kids and lived with his sister (he told me that his house had a fire and he was forced to move in with her). He told me he was a manager at a local pizza place, but then he told me he delivered pizza's which was part of his job as a manager, then later he told me he was a shift leader. He showed up at my house in his car with the pizza sign afixed to his car. He was wearing a leather jacket that looked 20 years old as there was barely any actual leather left on it, it was very faded. But worst of all, he had monster teeth. His teeth were all jagged and they were BLACK. I think he must have been in too many fights and the teeth that were mostly chipped off were all black from being dead. He was a nice guy, and I could see a slight potential for me to fall for him, but it was just so slight. I just don't think I could kiss a guy whose teeth were soooo bad. I didn't respond to any more messages from him.

Next guy I met also found me on myspace. This guy was a college educated guy, a CMC programmer. He seemed to have a good job and seemed very nice. His pictures on myspace indicated he had a large family and was a very family oriented guy. He was in shape and really quite buff. When I talked to him he mentioned how he took his mother to church every Sunday and that he had recently broken up with his fiance. I asked to meet him for a drink one night but he said that he had just paid bills and wouldn't have extra money to go to a bar but instead invited me to come hang out at his apartment which had a pool and we could have a few drinks and hang out at the pool. I agreed but told him that if I drank too much that I would have to stay on his couch. That was agreeable to him. I did go to see him and we sat up and had a lot to drink and sat and talked most of the night. I really enjoyed his company and I didn't sleep on the couch as it was. I did find out that night though that he was incapable of having sex after drinking. We did actually have sex the next morning (if you call it that). It was almost the worst sex I have ever had (the first would be with a guy I went to high school with who's penis was no larger than my pinky finger - guys pay attention, drugs and cigarettes really do stunt growth). This guy though stimulated himself to arousal by (I'm not kidding here) humping my leg. Believe it or not, the sex wasn't the worst part of dating this guy. I decided (I guess I was pretty desperate by this point) to try to make things work and continued to see him. Much to my chargrin, he had a very low self esteem. He constantly text me to ask me why I liked him and if I was sure that I wanted to be with him. After seeing him for 2 weeks and being bombarded with self esteem boosting text messages I finally put my foot down and told him that no, I didn't want to see him anymore. He politely replied that he understood (at least he was a gentleman - or so I thought). Then I got the inevitable text message to relieve me from any guilt for breaking up with him, one night he text me asking me if I wanted to fuck. WTF??? I didn't even want to go out with this guy, what in God's name made him think that I would ever want to have sex with him again??

On to the next I suppose. He had also found me on myspace. This one was about 8 years my junior which is really ok with me. The way I see it, guys die before women and younger guys typically have a higher sex drive. I'm down with it. Well, me and this guy got together just once before he told me he had to go out of town for a job (he was a contractor for a huge home surplus store where he worked to set up their display sections). I had a great time with him the first date, we played pool (I actually held my own against him even though my game really sucks), and then off to a bar where we could have talked all night, and then I invited him home with me. I loved his company but the sex was very brief. I didn't even come it was so brief, like under a minute. I understood though that it had been a while since he was with a girl. So, he was out of town for a few weeks for this job and while he was out of town we just text briefly. I checked his profile on occasion only to find out that he had been adding girls to his friends list. Ok, I wasn't going to date another myspace whore. I decided not to let it bother me and even agreed to let it go. When he was back in town we went out to dinner and then back to my place for drinks. Sex was pretty much the same, quick draw mcgraw. I sent him an email soon after that telling him that I didn't want to see another internet whore. He let me know very politely that the girls he added were his sisters that he found on myspace and that he would never try to cheat on me but he understood why I would want to stop seeing him. I felt bad after that but was relieved that I didn't have to not have another orgasm with him again.

Ok, so now I'm really wanting to just find a boyfriend who I click with. I signed up for yahoo's dating service which advertises it's free to sign up. It's in the small print that it's free to sign up, but you have to pay a membership fee to interact with anyone. Within 2 days of signing up I had over 20 responses. Damn. That's awesome, until I realized I had to pay a membership fee that I couldn't afford to pay. Nothinig going on there.

I continued searching out the "free" craigslist ads and one night (again after much to drink) found a guy who sounded perfect. I had seen his ads plenty of times before. He was always just looking for someone to hang out with in my neighborhood. Then the next morning he was always posting he was just looking for someone to go see a movie with. On this particular Saturday night I noticed he hadn't posted his usual movie buddy ad that morning, so I replied to his previous email about finding someone to hang out with. I asked why he wasn't looking for a movie buddy. We started communicating through email, then through instant messenger, and then on the phone. I was a little buzzed and open to it. We talked a lot and even planned on meeting up the next weekend. As fate would have it, we never got to meet. He had to go out of town for a job (what is up with these guys who have to go out of town to work??). We continued to talk quite regularly and I even offered and planned on picking him up at the airport when he came back into town 3 weeks later (even though I had to use an occurrence at work and call in sick for a guy I hadn't even met in person yet). I checked his pictures out on his myspace page and I already thought he was attractive, also intellectual, wrote poetry, and just had a great personality, his pictures on myspace though showed that he had a pretty good beer gut that wasn't evident in any of the pics I had seen of him on craigslist. I didn't care though, I really liked talking to this guy. When I told him I would pick him up, I told him I would take him home and he protested and said instead he wanted to come home with me that night. I assumed since he had been gone so long that he would want to go home. He said there was nothing at his house for him and he would rather spend the time with me. I was pretty elated and looking forward to meeting this great guy in person. To be honest with you, I was looking forward to getting laid. I had swore off all other men after I started talking to this guy (I even had another much more eligible guy find me on the internet (his profile reported that he made $125-$150k a year) but I blew off this other guy because I liked the one who was out of town for a month. I was so excited and looking forward to meeting this guy but then... We talked on the phone one night and I told him how excited I was to see him and all of the reasons why I was so excited (one of them was to get to know him biblically), he told me that he might not want to have sex with me. This came as a huge shock to me as I'd already had phone sex with him twice. I couldn't understand why he was dismissing even the possibility of having sex with me. I was pissed. I told him so and asked him why was I even picking him up and bringing him back to my place to spend the night. He responded that he could get another ride from the airport and I advised him it would be best to do so. I emailed him a couple times after that, sent him an invite to a Halloween party that I had already invited him to (hoping he would come and we could make up) but he was a no-show. When I emailed him the party invite I put as the subject line for him to not open the email. He used the same line to make a new cl ad and even throughout the message used I guess reverse psychology telling the reader of the ad to not contact him I guess in hopes that they would. I replied to his ad telling him it was plagarism for him to use my line and that I should sue him and I made sure to include lol to let him know I was just kidding. I have since then seen another ad he posted and this time he is searching for a skinny brunnette with long legs. Now, as much as I think he is good looking, he's NOT ALL THAT that he should be dictating that he's looking for a skinny girl with long legs. I didnt bother responding to him, guess he will find out when he doesnt get any responses that he is asking for too much. I am just going to leave him alone now.

Well, now as promised in the heading, back to square one. So I was bored and pmsing and extremely horny. I text messaged my fuck buddy. I had seen him a month before, he had text me out of the blue and at first I was reluctant to get together with him (I was on the rag and still talking to the previous guy). I told him I wasnt interested in hooking up. After I found out that there was no chance of me hooking up with the previous guy I text my fuck buddy back to tell him I was just on the rag and would like to get together. We did and it was just as incredible as always. My fuck buddy is very passionate. He knows exactly how to kiss and touch to make it a wonderful experience. Even if his cock wasn't involved I would probably still get off with how great of a lover he is (well, maybe that's not entirely true, but damn close). He told me he was working bartending as a side job and he had to work on Halloween. I told him I was off on Halloween and thinking of having a party but not sure. I decided to go ahead and have a party, actually two parties - one for my best friends on Saturday and one for all my work friends who had to work on Saturdays and that one was on Sunday. I sent my fuck buddy an invite but he was a no show. I was pretty disappointed because I really wanted to get it on with him. I text him later in the week to see if he wanted to get together but he had to work. He text me the next night, well actually it was the morning after the next night - at 5:10 am. He asked me what I was doing. It was November 1st, and I had already been passed out for a few hours, was on the rag, and asleep. I waited until the next morning to text him back at around 3 am to let him know that I was on the rag and was passed out by the time he text me. I told him that if he wanted to just see me then I could come over the next night (Nov 2) to hang out and I had a movie I wanted to watch with him as I was too scared to watch it on my own. He replied that I should bring it over right then and there. I reluctantly agreed and found myself at his apartment at 4 am. We started to watch the movie but ended up talking through it all. We then started watching another movie and went to bed. This was the first time I had spent the night with him at his place, only the second time ever that I had spent the night with him. While we were awake we talked a little bit about movies and he told me he wanted to see a movie that had just come out and we actually made plans to see it together. I don't know yet if this is an actual date or just a couple friends going to see a movie together. We made out the next morning (there are ways to make out even when you are on the rag, just let your imagination run wild here). Previously in the night I had asked him in a text if he would ever let me come to hang out at his bar while he's working and let me spend the night with him. I told him I didn't want to interfere with any of his action that he might be getting while he was working. To my surprise he said ANYTIME. So, now we have plans for me to come see him at work this Satuday and spend the night with him, and then we have plans to see a movie together on Sunday night. I'm very concerned about these turn of events. I realize that I still have a lot of feelings for this guy and have no idea how he feels about me. I had recently joined a free dating website and have gotten a little interest from it and may have met some potential boyfriends. My biggest fear is that, as one of my closest friends have reiterated to me, that I won't even try to meet someone else while my fuck buddy is still in my life. Anther thing is that even if my fuck buddy has decided he wants to get serious with me, do I even want him??? I don't want to be his consolation prize becuase he couldn't find someone "better" from his classified ad on craigslist. I think I might resent that and that could stunt any possibility of having a relationship with him if I feel resentment about that. I think that I will just have to set the record straight with him and tell him that I will be available to him as long as I am single, but don't plan on staying single. I guess I don't know where I am going at this point, but at least I have a happy ending in the meantime if ya know what I mean. Well, this is Keri, still single and still looking (I think). Over and out.

Chapter 4 - The Fuck Buddy

Ok, so there's this guy who went to my same high school. He is 5 years older then me and although we didn't know each other in high school he knew my older brothers. I don't remember him at all from back in my high school days and the weeks and months after high school. Apparently he saw me while I was working at a local restaraunt and I invited him to come over to my apartment (which back in the day was a small roach infested efficiency). He tells me that we made out but we didn't have sex (I wouldn't have sex with him, or so he tells me). This guy found me on myspace last fall and although I didn't recognize him I approved him to become a friend and was surprised to find that he not only went to my high school, he also worked for the same cable company where I work only he's in another department. We started corresponding through messages on myspace at first I was just trying to figure out who he was and how he knew me. It didn't take me long to find out his name and that it was common knowledge that he had slept with my best friend. It took even less time to find out that he had a very bad reputation for sleeping with girls and then never calling them again. My ex boyfriend who for a brief time was a fuck buddy made it very clear to me that if I ever see this guy that he would then be off limits to me for fear of catching an std. This guy was bad news. This is what everyone was telling me, don't get involved with him. Even one of my best friends in the whole world warned me against him. But it had been 15 years since I was in high school, people change, right?

After an arguement I stopped seeing my ex altogether right before Valentines Day this year and decided it wouldn't hurt to go meet this guy for a drink. It took some time to coordinate when would be a good time, it wasn't until March that we decided to meet, I was going to take him out for a couple drinks for his birthday but right before his birthday a close friend of his passed away, she was the fiance of one of his best friends. We decided to still meet for a drink, but not on his birthday, but the following Sunday which happened to be Easter. We talked and played pool and then just sat in the bar for a while after they closed and talked. We then walked back to his place and watched a little tv and kissed. At the time I had a really bad cold and just felt horrible and didn't want to meet him right away but figured he needed a friend right about then with his friend just passing. I didn't stay as he wanted me to. I was too sick and although I would have liked to stay and make out with this guy who was clearly into me (and I was definatley into him), I just wasn't up to it with my cold. After talking to him for a while we had made a ton of plans. He was going to come to my house the following Saturday and grill out and have a few drinks, then we were going to a concert together the next Sunday, and he had even told me he had a boat and wanted to take me out on it. This guy was awesome and I think I floated home that night on my own personal cloud. I was so glad that I didn't listen to all the rumors.

During the next few days I asked this guy to drop off some of his business cards for me as he was in sales at my company and I had a friend who was interested in getting service with us and it would help him to get the sale. He dropped off the cards and seemed a little standoffish, not nearly as into me as he had been just a few days before, but that could have had a little something to do with the alcohol he had been drinking, perhaps he was shy. I mentioned the steaks I had picked up to grill out that Saturday and made sure to let him know if he drank too much at my house I would tie him to my bed so he couldn't drive himself home, he definately seemed interested at the prospect of being tied to my bed. I couldn't wait. I had everything ready when the day came, steaks marinating, corn on the cob ready to throw on the grill, and steak fries ready to throw in the oven. We hadn't set a specific time when he was going to come over so I just kind of waited for him to show up. And I waited some more. And then I got hungry so decided to go ahead and cook only to find that the self ignitor on my grill wasn't working and ended up just going through a drive thru for dinner. I then started drinking. No sign of this guy in sight, no call, no text, no nothing. After quite a bit to drink I sent him a message to let him no that I was ok even though he stood me up. Then I deleted him from my friend list on myspace. We messaged each other back and forth a few times and he apologized several times and said that he was with his friend who had just lost his fiance and that his friend was pretty upset, he didnt' want to leave him. I'm a pretty understanding person, but that's what phones are for, if you can't make it, call me. I would have completely understood under the circumstances, but CALL ME, don't leave me sitting waiting to hear from you. I was a little intoxicated and a lot pissed off. I told him we could still be friends but that I wasn't going to try to date him again. Well, things happened, we continued to correspond on myspace and even decided to get together just for sex (it had been a while since I stopped seeing my ex and had an itch that I really needed scratched, even if it was with this guy). He came to my house early and waited in his car (he had promised me that he would never stand me up again) until exactly 7 pm when he was supposed to be here. I decided to delete details, but all I can say is WOW. After that we became fuck buddies, he would call me or I would call him or we would text and usually I would stop by his place on my way to work.

Things were pretty good for a while, until the inevitable happened. I started really looking forward to seeing this guy. I got excited and my heart beat wildly when I knew I was going to see him. OH MY GOD!!!! I HAD FEELINGS FOR THIS GUY!!! How the hell did that happen? It was mostly a sexual relationship, but after we were done we would usually hang out and talk or watch tv until I had to go to work or until I left his place. This was all wrong, I can't have feelings for this guy...or can I? I couldn't tell him about these feelings, I could barely even talk to him and had a nervous excitement anytime I was with him or even if I knew I was going to see him. I decided that I had to tell him how I felt and that maybe I did want to go out with him after all. I sent him a message telling him how I felt about him and that all he had to do was ask me out. I know he read the message on a Tuesday night around 9 pm. Wednesday came and went and I didn't hear from him, then Thursday, then Friday, and now here it was Saturday night. I was at home having a few drinks watching movies when I got an im from him. It was around 2 am and he was drunk and horny and wanted me to drive to his house to have sex with him. I told him I was too drunk to drive, his response was drive really slow. I was pretty upset and told him how I felt about him and that I didn't just want to have sex with him anymore, I wanted a lot more. He told me it was silly that we were talking about this in im and that I should go to his house (knowing full well that I was hammered). At the time I was supposed to be set up the following week by a friend of mine with a guy who I initally didn't give a chance because I met him right about the same time as I met my fuck buddy (before the fuck buddy stood me up). I decided to cut my fuck buddy loose and open myself to be set up by my friend. I told my fuck buddy this and he said he understood.

I was never set up by my friend because the night we were supposed to meet he had to attend a press conference and wasn't able to attend our montly get together where a few friends who were all laid off of a company we worked for still gathered. The next month came and went and I was still optimistic about being set up by my friend. And then the worst happened, the bar that we met at closed and had a for sale sign in the window. So here I was no prospect of meeting this new guy and I had ended all contact with my fuck buddy. Damn.

As things were I had a party planned and I had invited my fuck buddy to it previously and didn't want to have hard feelings against him so I sent him the official invite when I sent invites to everyone else. After sending the invite, I sent him an instant messages (after a few cocktails - note, I really should stop drinking, these evening beam or rum and diet Pepsi's really seem to get me in trouble), the instant message said he should bring a girlfriend to my party or a cute friend that he could set me up with. I told him that I couldn't guarantee that I wouldn't flirt with him (flirting seems to go hand in hand with mixed drinks and jello shots) at the party which would be bad because we work together and don't want to give the impression to co-workers that we're seeing each other. He replied to tell me that he would be at the party and this opened communications. He started texting me to see if I had to work and one night I told him I was off he asked me to come over. I did. It was just as incredible as before. Nothing was ever mentioned about my feelings for him, but he told me he missed me. It was just another week until my party and true for his word he came. He was the only person who stayed over although I had told everyone if they drank too much they were welcome to stay. We had a great night and an even better morning. I thought things might actually work out for us this time.

We had discussed going to see a movie together that we both wanted to see, so I sent him a message to ask if he wanted to go the following weekend. He replied that he already had plans, which was cool. It wasn't until later that week that I found while browsing the ads (some of them are very humerous and I only check them for entertainment), that my fuck buddy had posted an ad the very next day after he left my house. He was looking for a girlfriend who was decent and had morals and good sence (yeah, that's how he spelled it). I was furious, and hurt. I decided to be diplomatic about the situation though, I replied to the ad he posted to let him know that I understood that nothing more would ever happen between us and needed to cut him loose for good, and I did. That was almost 6 weeks ago and I still think about him quite a bit. I had started seeing someone else who will probably be the subject of my next blog but it didn't last very long (and even when I was with him I thought a lot about my fuck buddy). I guess I am still hopeful that Mr. Right is still out there. In the meantime I joined a personals website last night. Still haven't checked yet to see if I've gotten any responses, but figure it can't hurt (if nothing else it will give me some more material to write about). Well until next time, this has been Keri, still single and still looking, over and out.

Chapter 3 - The One Who Got Away

It's been a minute since I've written about my misadventures in dating, no fear that I'm not single anymore, just have been busy working a lot at my day job. There have been a few developments in my personal life, but not much of developments. I guess we'll discuss boyfriend possibility number one. I went out partying with my girlfriend Steph one night and after spending a lot of time at a lame ass bar that I liked only because it had an outdoor patio where I could drink and smoke legally we decided to finally leave and go somewhere else as the only hot guy had left already. We went to another local bar here in Milford. It was pretty late, around 12 or 1 am by the time we got there and had a few more drinks and checked out the hot freaking men there (well I did anyway, Steph's attached). I ended up talking to one who gave me a ride home and we had really fucking great sex (insert condom ad, this night was brought to us by Trojan Her Pleasure (and it really was her pleasure that night)). Now come on, don't be judgemental, I had stopped seeing my fuck buddy the month before and was really wanting it bad, and it's not like anyone reading this has never ever had a one night stand. I didn't expect it to be a one night stand, he was a very hot guy, 30 years old, had a good job, nice body (really, really nice) and he was just hot. He had to leave a few hours later because his son was being dropped off at 7 am and he had to be home when his ex dropped him off. Before he left my house he gave me his phone number and I put it in my cell phone and each time I repeated it back I was wrong (the 8 or so beam and cokes I'd drank might have had something to do with that). Finally, the last time I repeated it back to him he told me I had it right and even though I didn't correct it in my cell phone directory I knew I would remember it. He told me to call him and then he kissed me while he held my face in his strong hands (wow, I love it when guys do that), and then he told me again to call him and I told him again that I would. He kissed me again before he repeated one last time for me to call him, this time I told him I would call him that I would call him today (it was today already nearing 4 am) and then he kissed me one last time before he left. It was so hot, I was on cloud nine and went to sleep and woke up with a smile.



I didn't in fact call him that day, due to circumstances that were out of my control. I just didn't have time to call him because of unexpected events and then working late. I settled on calling him the next night after I got off work. I tried calling the number that was in my cell phone and unless he turned black since he left my house early Saturday morning, I had the wrong number. Then it hit me how I kept entering his phone number wrong. I probably called 10 variations of the phone number I thought was his before finally giving up. Well, I guess giving up is not quite right, I gave up on calling him. I decided (kicking and screaming and dragging my feet the whole way) to post my very first ad in Craigslist under the missed connections column. I simply wrote that he gave me a ride home and that I kept getting his phone number wrong even though he told me 3 times what it was. I put for him to reply to my ad or to just stop by my house as we live in the same neighborhood. Much to my disappointment I received no reply and he hasn't stopped by my house.

Ok, was I really going to let this hot guy get away just like that? No, I don't think so. It took me a couple weeks to get the nerve up, but on 4th of July I decided since I didn't have any plans to walk down to the bar (it's a little ways from my house or I would go there more) and see if he was there. Much to my suprise he was there and surrounded by a group of his friends. It was impossible to get him alone so I didn't even try. I wanted to tell him that I tried to call him but had the wrong phone number, but didn't want to say it in front of his friends. I left myself open for him to come talk to me, I sat alone at a patio table just having my beam and coke and cigarette. He did waive to me and even said hi and we had 'small talk' and it was so small. I wanted to just scream why won't you just come over and talk to me, but I was way too sober to try anything like that. I still don't know if he didn't want to see me again or if maybe he thought I didn't want to see him again because I never called. Apparently him and his friends all go to said bar pretty frequently. I suppose I could go up there one night around closing time and would have pretty good odds of hooking up with him, but that's not what I want. I don't need another fuck buddy. I still have major heartbreak issues from my last fuck buddy. I suppose I can't put that blog off much longer, you'll read about him in the next post which will include new developments in that relationship. I'm very sad that I had the wrong number and never got together again with hot guy from the bar. Girls and guys take a lesson, make sure you have the right phone number before you let that hottie out of your sight. I guess for now I'll keep looking. This is Keri over and out and still single.

Chapter 2 - Internet Dating

I almost made this column about fuck buddies but not sure if I want to write about that yet as I haven't seen my most recent fuck buddy in almost a month and decided instead to write about current things that are going on in the black whole that is my dating life. Tonight I want to write a little bit about Craigslist and Myspace men.

For those of you who live in a cave, Myspace is a social network where you can stay connected with friends and even make new friends and even meet prospective dates. Craigslist is basically an internet classified ad, similar to a newspaper but with pictures ( some are very graphic pictures). Now don't everyone go running to Craigslist right now, it will still be there after you finish reading my blog.

I am a pretty conservative person and even a little shy at first. I don't usually make the first move, the exception is when I've been drinking (which is 1-2 nights a week). I recently invited a guy who I had seen listed on Craigslist and then seen again on Myspage group for Cincinnati Singles to be a friend through Myspace. Even though this guy looked extrely hot in his Craigslist ad and thought if nothing else he would be cool to hang out with, I decided not to write to him because he lives very far away, like an hour drive. When I then saw him again on the Cincinnati Singles group in Myspace and I had had a few drinks I decided to invite him to be a friend of mine and told him that it sucked he lived so far away but maybe we could be friends. I received a reply the next day thanking me for adding him and we began a correspondence that has lasted almost a week now. That isn't a very long time but we've written to each other several times a day back and forth. Good dialog although he can't type, only chicken peck so it's not as deep of conversations as if we were say talking on the phone or in person. His "thing" is that he wants to get married. I'm not sure I want to go there, not today anyway, but maybe if he is the right guy, who knows. Well after a night of drinking a bottle of wine and corresponding with him I let it slip that I had seen his craigslist ad and that I look at those ads to see what's out there (to date that is) and enjoy giggling with my girlfriends at the penis pictures in the Casual Encounters section (and there are lots of those!!). Well much to my surprise before we even had a chance to meet, this hot guy has resposted his craigslist ad TODAY!! I am not sure if he is testing me to see if I am still looking or if he has changed his mind about marrying me, as he said that is what he wanted to do (which of course is completely ridiculous). I was concerned about being with him anyway, he told me he was poor white trash and unemployed right now looking for a job (but even so, he is hot!!). Well, I guess I will be better off not getting together with him and that I know how he is before I meet him. This is Craigslist guy # 2. Read on to hear about Craigslist guy # 1.

Craigslist guy # 1 sounded perfect, except he was also a distance from my house. He wrote in his ad that he had a sick sense of humor and that he liked horror movies. Sounds perfect (for me anyway as I am slightly dark and twisted). He looked tall and said he is the nice guy that girls never go for, instead they go for the wrong type of guy. I wrote to him in a drunken stupor and even flirted with him a little bit. He wrote back and we started corresponding. I invited him to come over and watch movies at my house or go out to see a movie or something. His reply was that I might take advantage of him, and he had often in our correspondence told me that he needed an aggressive woman who will make the first move as he is never able to because he's shy. I told him I don't have a problem making the first move. He made a comment that if he came over to my house to watch a movie that I might take advantage of him and my reply was that it would be the first time we would meet and that he was fairly safe but there was always wishful thinking. His reply was that he might already be wishful thinking. My reply was then what is he afraid of? I never received a reply after that. I guess he was not just the nice guy that girls never went for, he was the asshole guy that was just looking to get laid. I carouse the Craigslist ads on a fairly regular basis and later found an ad very similar to his in the Casual Encounters section (which is exactly what it sounds like, people wanting to find someone to have sex with) where the man was looking for sex instead of a girlfriend, I'm sure it was him only the picture only showed his bare chest (which really wasn't all that to look at). Craigslist guy # 1 has reposted his ad (for dating) about once or twice a week. I don't think he'll ever find what he's looking for as he seems to really just want to find a girl who will have sex with him but in his ad he is looking for a girlfriend. There's a big difference.

Now, that I'm all Craigslisted out (I still like to look but don't think I will be writing to anyone from that world again) let's move on to Myspace. I like Myspace because there is usually a lot of information about the people who request to be your friend. Most of the time guys ask me to be friends, but there are a few exceptions, I've asked a few guys to be friends (craigslist guy # 2 was one of those). The most recent guy who asked me to be his friend and started sending me messages seemed like a nice guy, a little bit older than me, 47, but not bad looking in his pics. We had barely talked on myspace, just a few messages back and forth and had even discussed going the following weekend to meet and have a few drinks. He told me he was new to Myspace. Well apparently he was because he sent me a message that he meant to send to someone else. It wasn't a message that seemed to mean anything, just telling someone to have fun and be careful. No idea who it was meant for, but I kind of got the feeling that he was talking to a lot of other women on myspace. I really couldn't tell because he kept his friends hidden. I was a little more than annoyed when I read this message and told him that if he is a myspace whore talking to every woman he befriends then I'm really not interested in him and have had problems with myspace guys in the past. I told him to have fun on myspace but I wasn't interested in meeting him. Since then he has sent me 6 messages and 4 image comments all of which have gone unread. It may have very well been an innocent mistake and an innocent message going to one of his friends, but I was annoyed by it, have limited patience for myspace whores especially after I've had a few drinks.

Next myspace guy I would like to talk about was a very nice guy. We wrote and then talked on the phone and then decided to meet and go out. He took me to a local steakhouse which was good but thought he was dense because he couldn't pick up the signs that after we finished out dinner the waitress came back several times to get the check but he wasn't ready to pay yet as we were waiting a few minutes before the movie started which I thought was rude anyway that we were holding the waitresses table hostage. He wanted to wait though, so I didn't protest. Then when we were ready to pay and go to the movie across the street the waitress was nowhere to be found and he complained about that. That was only one thing that I should have called him on but didn't. The other thing was that he mentioned to me that his brother was at the restaurant, his brother who he didn't talk to and he had to text someone about it. But it wasn't just one or two text messages throughout dinner, it was an entire text conversation throughout dinner and even the movie. OK, well, it was about telling his brothers ex that he had seen his brother or something. I was a little annoyed, but besides the text and the thing with the waitress, he was still like a nice guy, good job, opened the door to his truck for me. I gave him another chance and had him over to my house for BBQ ribs and to watch a movie. Still with the text messages. He is a business owner and the first texts he told me was about a job, well, that's understandable. I can't get upset for him working, just glad that he is working, but as the night progressed he continued texting even while watching the movie. I asked if all of those texts are for work and he said no, that was just a friend of his he was texting. So he's obsessed with text messaging. That was the last time I saw him. I shouldn't have to tell a 30 something year old that it's not polite to text on a date. Well, I have a couple more stories of guys who have found me on myspace but they are guys that were actually in my life years ago and wanted to reconnect so I won't lump them in with the unknowns that make up my bad internet dates. I have been told as you may have already read in Chapter 1, that the perfect guy suggested I try internet dating like match.com. I haven't gone there yet but maybe that will be something to consider if I don't find somebody soon. Well, this concludes chapter 2. Please stay tuned, I think the next chapter will be on ex boyfriends, although I may actually need to make a whole series for that, unless something happens in my dating life between now and then that is. Well this is Keri, over and out and still single in Milford.

Welcome to my blog/meeting the perfect guy.

Welcome to my blog! I guess I should introduce myself, my name is Keri and I reside in the city of Milford Ohio which is just east of Cincinnati. I am a single woman aged 34, Sagittarius (which happens to be the only sign that has a weapon, a fact that I am particularly proud of), I work in customer service (I could write books about work experiences and some of them will leak into this blog I'm sure), and did I say single? Yep, single and looking, some days I feel like I will just be perpetually single, my friends are already making jokes that I will end up as a crazy cat person (that definitely won't be me as I have no desire to take care of another cat after the fiasco with my ex's cats which you will all read about down the road). I'm a little nutty for my age, and in no way mature. I like to have fun and goof a lot. And presently, I don't think I have any girlfriends who are single, in fact, I don't think any of the girls I work with (and I work in a call center, there are a lot of girls there) are single. Everyone has a boyfriend or a husband; let's see, that make me a third wheel.

The inspiration for this blog is Sex and the City and Carrie Bradshaw's experiences dating in New York. Had originally thought about naming this blog sex and the suburbs but that would be too much of a rip from SATC and it would be wholly inaccurate if there is no sex, so Dating in the Suburbs works much better for me. I have often shared my dating adventures and misadventures with friends and was encouraged to write about them in a blog which brings me here. I'm new to blogging but love to write, just out of practice. Eventually when I am disciplined enough I will sit down and write my first novel, I'm sure you will read all about that when it happens if you are all still here with me.

Now to the juicy. I made it out of the house all weekend. I worked late Friday night but was invited to go see some friends at a bar in the neighborhood we grew up in. It was after 1 am when I arrived and my very good friend Steph was trashed. She had attended a funeral that day and it had been especially hard on her. She was very sad one minute remembering her friend who had passed and very happy the next. This was one of the very rare times that she had more to drink than I did. At one point her boyfriend who seems like a really nice guy requested the dj play a song and the two of them got up to dance. It was already last call and I had had just 2 drinks and had to head home soon as I was working the following day. As I sat alone at the bar waiting for my couple friends to return from their dance a man came up and used the ashtray that was in front of me (smoking is actually illegal in bars in Ohio now but some of them still allow it and are willing to pay the fines to keep the smoking customers coming back). He was a handsome guy, clean cut, short dark hair wearing a white button down dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up that wasn't tucked in. He tried to light his cigarette with a match but it didn't light so he grabbed the lighter that was sitting on my pack and lit it. I noticed he had strong forearms when he did this, which was really hot. He sat down next to me and introduced himself. I introduced myself in return. We started talking a little bit but within a few minutes my friends came back from their dance and my dear friend Steph came up to me and this handsome man and tried to introduce us (she had asked him his name and then told him my name). Steph was drunk and may not have been able to see the sparks that were already flying, but I certainly could see them. I was so excited to finally meet a handsome, intelligent, college educated man with a good job and his own house (I am a homeowner too btw, I'm not looking for a man who has a house to move in with, just believe it's a sign of responsibility for a man to have their own home). Was this guy really here? Steph kept telling me he was cute, she probably meant to whisper it to me, but she was saying it loud enough for him and half the bar to hear. Her boyfriend grabbed her and they left and this gorgeous man offered to walk me to my car, ummm HELL YES!!!

Walking to the car we discussed home ownership and the cicadas that are out in force this summer. I mentioned to him that I was going to be having a party next month and of course he was invited. We got to my car and he kissed me which was incredible (the last guy I tried to date couldn't kiss at all, it was more like tongue wrestling but that will be for another blog). Ok, so let's see, looks (check), intelligence (check), responsible (check), nice (so far check), good job (check), good kisser (check thank freaking god), pinch me, is this for real? So we are kissing leaning against my car and then we exchange phone numbers and he tells me I'm smoking hot. Then he tells me, oh by the way, I probably should tell you that I have a girlfriend that I live with (WTF???). How is it I finally meet the right guy and he's not even available. As much of a flirt as I am when I've been drinking I did not come on to him at all, he approached me. He then apologized and told me he has been with his girlfriend for 5 years and will never break up with her, he just had wanted to kiss me since I walked into the bar, wanted to feel what it was like to kiss a girl again for the first time. I told him he needed to go home to his girlfriend. He wanted to kiss me again, at first I protested but then gave in, after all it was very nice to kiss him. He was tall and had broad shoulders and I could tell he worked out. He wanted to talk to me so I invited him into my car and we drove up away from the houses I was parked in front of and then parked closer to the bar.

We talked about school and his friends and how bored he was with his girlfriend. I told him he should be glad to have someone in his life that he cares about, myself I was dying to meet a nice guy. He suggested I try internet dating. 2 of his friends had success meeting girls on internet dating websites and one of them was even getting married. He told me that I shouldn't give up that there are guys out there. He told me he liked me a lot and it was nice talking to someone on the same wavelength as he was. He would have been so perfect. As it was already after 3 am I told him that I had to go as I had to work the next day. We kissed again, several times in fact. I felt bad that I was kissing another girls boyfriend and knew that I would be crazy angry if a boyfriend of mine had kissed another woman. He waived as I drove away and I turned on my radio (Buckcherry cd just happened to be playing Everything). I listed to it and lit up another cigarette when my cell rang. It was him calling already wanting to talk, he likes to talk to people when he's driving. I told him I needed to concentrate on the road as even though I've only had 2 drinks I still didn't wish to be pulled over. He said he understood and we said our goodbyes and hung up.

I expected this guy to annoy me and want to be friends or something, he had mentioned he wanted me to meet his girlfriend and her cousin that they would really like hanging out with me but I told him that would be just too weird and he realized I was right. It's been 3 days and he hasn't called again. This is the first time I'm actually glad not to hear back from a man. I guess this would be my luck to meet the *perfect* guy and he wouldn't be available. I really don't need to go to a bar to find an unavailable guy though, there's one I'm trying to keep in the background. Maybe I'll write about him one day. I thought that maybe this guy would decide to break up with his girlfriend, but I don't think I would want him if he did. If he did it to her he might do it to me. So where oh where are all the single AVAILABLE men? I'll keep looking. Keri over and out and still single.